Verbal Abuse Recovery
It has been too long since I posted, but things have been quiet. Our daughter is grown now and so there is less communication now. On occasion I think my ex-husband got away with everything, but what did he really get away with? Did he ruin my life? No. Did he drive my daughter away from me? Again, the answer is no. She and I communicate regularly.
It really makes me sad that her father does the things he does. It is so unhealthy and confusing. Especially all the blaming he does and how he doesn't ever take ownership for his part in fights. He has never taken ownership of anything over the past 25 years I have known him.
Last week, my daughter returned home from an abusive and toxic living situation at her father's house. He also sent her some irrational and threatening text messages when he learned she had come to my house. He expected me to email him to prove she was at my house. Our daughter is a young adult... Continue Reading →
After three years hoping and praying our daughter would see the truth in her abusive father, my dream came true. It is bittersweet because this is not the type of relationship a person would ever wish for their daughter. It would have been great if she had two parents working together only interested in her... Continue Reading →
The other day I was spending time working on my craft and this song came into rotation. For some reason, this song captured my heart right away. After a moment, I realized what she was singing about it brought tears to my eyes. This song was talking about a love triangle between divorced parents. The artist is singing about divorce and how it impacts children. This song made me think about my daughter.
Last week, my daughter told me she wants to come by on Sunday to see me for Mother's Day, but she is not allowed to drive his car to the city where I live again. It is extremely frustrating to me that we are still having these types of conversations when our daughter is 20 years old. This is crazy controlling and she is still not ready or able to challenge him yet.
So, it has been a very long time since I have had to communicate with my abusive ex. Do I miss it? Nope, not one tiny little bit. It is still difficult navigating the relationship with my daughter since she still lives in his house and he is still very controlling. To my daughter, she may believe his being controlling is a form of love. Hopefully she will learn one day that control is not love.
On so many levels, it seems like my ex is still controlling me. It shouldn't feel this way, but it does. Our daughter is nearly twenty years old and still cannot come visit me. In order for me to see my daughter, I always have to go see her. Her father has a rule that she cannot come to the city where I live.
This is a story from one of our readers: "We love charming men. When I first met RS, I thought I had found one of the most charming men I had ever met. He’s handsome and his initial personality melted me. He wanted to spend every single day with me, was very affectionate, brought me... Continue Reading →
So, I met with my daughter on Friday for my birthday. Our conversation was good and she did discuss her plans on moving out next year, but did not discuss the reasons why. Since I do have a bit of information, I was able to ask her questions about her plans. I asked if she... Continue Reading →
Last week, I stopped by to visit a friend who used to live down the street from my old house. She said that my daughter has been hanging out with her daughter. My friend was conflicted about discussing this information with me, but she felt as a mother, I should know. Apparently, something happened between... Continue Reading →
So, it has been nearly two years since my daughter left our house to go live with her father. Looking back, I have definitely made progress. There have been a few changes. One, my daughter is no longer so angry as she was when she initially left. Also, the fact that time has a way... Continue Reading →
Since 2010, I have been writing in this blog and posting experiences. Oftentimes I forget how dysfunctional these experiences were at the time. Time has a away of softening things and making you remember the story in a less crazy light. My post Accepting the Painful Reality was one of the ones that really stuck... Continue Reading →
In this post, I am going to discuss what Parental Alienation is and how it affected my family. In my personal experience, there have been three separate situations where it exists and in all three stories men did it. Parental alienation is the process, and the result, of psychological manipulation of a child into showing unwarranted... Continue Reading →
Recently I have been binge watching The Handmaid's Tale. I must say this is probably not the best show to binge watch because it is tale of a very dark totalitarian society. Nearly every episode is dark, disturbing, and rather abusive. However, there are may parallels between the abuse of power displayed and what life... Continue Reading →
Today is another day, I feel renewed, and stronger. There is no way I am going to give up and allow my twisted ex-husband to win his sick game. This entire situation has been unfair and flat out wrong. I was a good mother and did not deserve this type of treatment from my ex... Continue Reading →
It has been while since I have written. Sometimes it can be just too painful to write in this blog and think about these painful topics. Since my daughter left, it has been a difficult 'almost' two years. However, looking back, I realize that healthy progress has been made. My daughter keeps reaching out to... Continue Reading →
I have not been as diligent about writing my thoughts lately. On some days, it is still a struggle. I miss my daughter terribly and really hurts my heart how things ended up. It seems that it is not uncommon for children to make a decision to move in with the other parent. In this... Continue Reading →
Here is a story about verbal abuse from one of our readers: Domestic Violence is a slow dehumanizing experience. I couldn't even see it was happening. I wondered what was wrong with me. I thought it was abuse. I tried to get him to believe it was abuse. However, I should have just trusted my... Continue Reading →
Over the years, I have found a few great tips to deal with abusive emails. These are two great tips and tricks to help you avoid being surprised and also how to respond to the facts. Hopefully these tips are helpful to you too. Abusive Email Tip #1 In most email servers, you can create... Continue Reading →
There are several reasons why you should consider going No Contact with Abusers, Narcissists, and Emotional Manipulators. There may be reasons why you cannot block the person, but you can take steps to ensure you are not surprised by their emails. Emotional Health You deserve to protect your emotional health from abuser, narcissist, and/or emotional... Continue Reading →
Is This Abusive 