It seems we are in a time where some abusive bosses can take advantage of the down economy to justify their abusive behaviors. There are less jobs available right now which could make an employee endure a situation they might not otherwise tolerate. Accepting unacceptable behavior is more likely when your personal finances are at stake. One thing I noticed was the people getting abused the most seemed to be women of a variety of ages.
One thing I noticed is I gradually became surrounded by co-workers that were just out of college in their first or second jobs. Not only could my boss pay them less but he could ask more from them and use their job to threaten them. They were paid too little and expected to do too much. When they did complain they might hear the argument on just how valuable their position was and how many people would like to work there. Unacceptable behavior certainly seems more acceptable if you do not have any other comparisons.
I personally have had experience of living with a verbally abusive ex-husband and have already tolerated unacceptable behavior for far too long to do it in the workplace. My boss actually said, “Your perception is tainted by your past experience.” This was because he had gradually over three years witnessed a few instances of my ex-husband’s bad behavior and was somewhat aware of what I had been through.
My past experiences have not tainted my perception. My personal experience with a verbally abusive individual has made me aware of what is unacceptable inside and outside of the workforce.
However, because my family depended on my finances I tolerated that unhealthy work environment for longer that I should have. When I began noticing the signs of stress in my body was when I realized I could not continue on much longer with that. Having to talk an anxiety pill to get through my day at work is simply not okay. Since I quit my job I noticed I rarely have to take a pill during the daytime which shows you the level of stress was inexcusable.
Justifying the bad behavior by claiming all the stress, extra workload was so he could create security for us and that was suppose to make it okay. So was he actually calling himself my savior? Unfortunately I think you will find many abusive men & even women in prominent positions in the work place. Many abusive people I know are very ambitious and they are really good at putting on a mask for the world to see.
My abusive ex-husband needed to have titles, money and expensive things to establish his self worth. He would truly step on anyone to get to this place of importance. He was very good at mirroring the behavior of those around him and would be considered a high-level performer. If he met a person of importance who was a Christian and did not drink then he would not drink when they had meetings. If the person of importance liked to golf and drink that was even better.